Ever sit up at night thinking, analysing, stressing, worrying, weighing up possible outcomes, how someone will react, what they will think, how you will be perceived…..your mind is working like the old proverbial mouse on a wheel “round and round” with no destination…are you dizzy yet?
This happened to me recently, it was a chain reaction of emotion, I had an exchange of text messages with a friend of mine, they sent me a message, I responded and then I got no response, the conversation wasn’t even anything controversial or out of the ordinary, so the fact they didn’t respond was unusual…. I spent the evening thinking about my message and then the over analysing began with thoughts like, “what did I say wrong?”, “Did I sound blunt?” , “How did they perceive what I said?” , “Why are they not responding?” and it went on and on…. It resulted in me sitting up bolt upright in bed with no sleep to the point where I had worked myself up so much that I started to have mild anxiety about the whole thing. The next morning I woke up to still no response and again and the level of anxiety grew and thoughts continued to ruminate over and over.
Since we are talking about analysing our thought, have you ever thought about how much energy you use thinking about things that never ever eventuate? And the effect this has on your physiology, stress levels and your mental state? What I realised is that this exchange bought up my insecurities and emotional triggers from past situations and relationships, that resulted in me playing out a complete scene of doom and gloom in my mind and causing myself to go into a panic attack. It also made me jump to assumptions that were based on my own emotional triggers.
What this highlighted to me was the importance of remaining present and focused on what is happening in the here and now, this is one of the most fundamental principles of mindfulness, It also demonstrated that even though I practice and teach these techniques, that sometimes I am not immune to being triggered. The other thing I want to note is that the perception of achieving a 100% blissful state of Zen is an aspiration, but in practical terms not a reality, as we are emotional beings and sometimes we can overreact, get worked up or become overwhelmed, this is a completely normal part of the healing process.
The only way I believe you can heal and process emotion is by feeling it, observing it, accepting it and forgiving it which eventuates in release. Please be patient and kind with yourself during healing as it is not something than can be rushed as it can bring up strong emotion, Breathe and know that the feelings are only temporary and try to remember that the pain you are releasing now will only bring you closer to your future happiness.
Many Blessings
